Overcoming the Suicidal Perspective

In the opening line of Albert Camus’ philosophical classic The Myth of Sysyphus, the ultimate question of philosophy is laid out: “There is only one really serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide. Deciding whether or not life is worth living is to answer the fundamental question in philosophy. All other questions follow from that.”  In Hamlet, Shakespeare wrote “to be or not to be, that is the question”. Many people, more than you think, have thought about death as a release. A release from the pain, suffering, uncertainty, demands, and disappointments of this world. That’s understandable since there is so much of it around us at all times.  

To be frank, suicide is a sickness of perspective. In her book, Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide, Kay Redfield Jamison discusses the perspective of someone struggling with suicidal ideations or behaviors . She helps us to understand it by keeping in mind the 3 “I’s” of suicide (notice how these are all perspective/judgment based):

My pain is:

Intolerable - I can’t take it anymore

Inescapable - I can’t get away from it

Interminable - It’s never going to end.

 If all you are seeing in your life is unnecessary suffering from which there is no escape, no end, and is beyond your capacity to tolerate it, then what else might you conclude other than making an exit on your own terms?

Because pain narrows our vision and isolates us it is crucial to pull back, and take on a different and more accurate “gestalt” type view. Gestalt psychology emphasizes viewing the image as a whole or the entirety of a set of patterns to better understand our reality. The gestalt theory says that the whole of an object or image/scene is more important than its individual parts. When we are in pain, we lose focus and perspective of our lives as a whole - most importantly the potential of what it could be. This is understandable depending on how brutal the pain is that we are experiencing. When one is in pain, be it emotional or physical, being able to think about anything else can feel impossible.

The key to managing our pain and combatting/managing the suicidal perspective is making a crack in those otherwise solid concrete “I” perspectives listed above. By asking certain questions and challenging one’s assumptions that have led to concluding that our pain is intolerable, inescapable, and interminable we allow some of the light in; for in the darkness our perception is limited to what is right in front of us but in the light, more is illuminated and that includes meaningful paths or perspectives that can give us what we need the most in those moments: hope.  

The key to all of this working however is faith (not necessarily religious faith). Choosing to live, despite our darkest moments of pain and hopelessness, is dependent on a faith that life has meaning, purpose, and a mission for us to accomplish. 

We may be blinded to how all of the pieces of the proverbial puzzle that is our life fit together, but if we have faith in life having meaning and purpose, and do our best to fulfill whatever significant tasks are asked of us, I believe our perspective will change and at the end of life, the puzzle comes together to reveal something deeply significant and beautiful that otherwise would not have happened if we did not endure. 

Finding “something to do, something to love, something to hope for”* that matters more to you than your pain just may be what is necessary for survival when the darkness comes and  “night falls fast”.

We can’t predict the future, so how do you know your life will always be like this? I have seen people on the edge; wanting to end their lives based on an assumption that their life is and will always remain intolerable and inescapable. I have also seen those same individuals who make it through and stay alive to then look back on that prediction only to be proven wrong but in the best way possible. 

We don’t know what will happen to us and maybe that is a good thing; for if we did know, we would be robbed of the meaning that comes from striving for a better life. Maybe it’s not the life we thought we would have and we don’t know what life will bring but that is the best part - for while we can’t control what set of paints we’ve been given, who’s to stop us from mixing these paint colors and creating something meaningful and uniquely beautiful onto the metaphorical canvases of our lives?! 

References:

The Myth of Sisyphus - Albert Camus

Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide - Kay Redfield Jamison 

*Quote attributed to George Washington Burnap, 1841